Monday, 4 August 2014

Shaming Language is YOUR Problem

“Shaming language” – A term most often used by feminists and MRAs in an attempt to control another person’s speech. It’s also used by the feeling’s police, otherwise known as the politically correct crowd. They trot out this pathetic term whenever they feel that their delicate sensibilities have been trodden on by someone else’s right to express themselves. These whiny individuals claim they are all for free speech, but the reality is they are not because the moment you say something vaguely insulting to their delicate little feelings, they pull out the worn and tattered ‘shaming language’ card. 

“Shaming language” is a relatively new bullshit term that has grown in popularity with the “can’t hack-it” crowd. It’s a term that pseudo children with huge self-image problems and emotional insecurities cling to when the going gets tough. These are the people who feel the world must cater to their every whiny whim and that silencing anyone who has inflicted pain on their oh-so delicate ego’s is somehow acceptable. These people can’t function without being catered to and feeling that they are the only one’s that matter. 

The truth is that someone cannot truly shame you. Shame is basically the sense that who you are is somehow wrong. On a basic level, shame is the underlying and pervasive belief that one is somehow defective or unacceptable. Shame is usually accompanied by a physical reaction which is derived from an individual’s emotions. All these problems are internally those of the individual who is feeling shamed. It is important to recognize that YOU are the person who shames you the most.  One way to think about this is that you must “turn up the volume” on the shaming language you take issues with in your life in order to hear them more clearly so you can change them – not so you can listen to them more closely and then bitch about them and attempt to control everyone else’s speech. 

The real issue stems from low self-esteem and a negative internal dialogue of the person who feels shamed. I cannot make you feel shamed by any words I may say to you – only you can do that by internalizing it and allowing yourself to be convinced that it is somehow a true reflection of who you are as an individual. 

Others are not responsible for your personal insecurities, poor self-esteem, or whatever other internal problems you may have. If tell a guy to “man up”, or tell some woman she is a “whore”, it is up to them how they will react to those words, but it is certainly not my, or anyone else’s, responsibility to be the keeper of your fucked up mental state. 

If I say those words to you, or even in general where they are not even directly aimed at you, and you feel like less of a man for some personal or emotional reason, or if you feel like you are indeed a bad person for having a lot of casual sex, then you need to examine why YOU feel ashamed instead of trying to spin it around and pathetically attempt to shame me, which is not only ironic, but will also not work because I am not ashamed of saying what I did. 

You can attempt to blame others for so-called “shaming language”, but at the end of the day you are the only one responsible for how you feel. And quite frankly I don’t have the time or the energy to try and monitor my language or speech for every person I may interact with on a daily basis. Deal with your own fucked-up problems and stop trying to blame everyone else for your inability to cope with something as trivial as words a person writes or says. If you are that bloody sensitive to everything, then perhaps you should seek some professional help, or get the hell off the internet. 

Constantly looking for reasons to feel like crap and complain is not healthy, and if you are one of these damaged individuals that internalizes everything someone says, then you seriously need to get a grip on reality and start making some real changes to your own life so you can stop being such a whiny, insecure little bitch.